Strange love's awesome story

As far as laws go, a couple of things need to change in India, especially the one regarding drinking in public places such as movie theaters. I know it's a big step, but then how else can one tolerate movies like Ajab Prem Ki Ghazab Kahani?

The day started off well enough, with a bike trip around Amsterdam which included a 12 km cycle route courtesy Mike's Bikes. This was followed by a leisurely stroll around the heart of the city and dinner at a Sports Bar with rowdy English fans falling all over the place. So since I wanted to end the day on a high, I really had to take some serious action. I'm not talking about something as pedantic as smoking a joint or having magic mushrooms. I'm talking APKGK.

Sometimes when things are terrible, you must be an optimist and look at the positives. So, since I'm feeling generous, I must say this:

• Ranbir Kapoor is so cute. and
• Beer makes a crap movie better.

These were the two factors that kept me going throughout the collection of super cliched jokes and situations including the mandatory chase sequences, 'funny fight scenes', corny love story, forced acting and ridiculous co-incidences like the hero and leading lady both being vegetarian and (horrors) stammering when they're upset.

Despite such ridiculous situations there was one brilliant joke in the movie where (Spoiler alert) Salman Khan (playing himself) gets introduced to Katrina Kaif and admonishes Ranbir for introducing her almost as though she was Sallu's own girlfriend. Very nicely done, despite Salman's accent.

However, the magic realism really became too much though when random pre-independence British authorities and Jesus Christ made their appearance to push the story line into oblivion. In terms of performances, Upen Patel gives a stellar performance in his role of irritating guy 1, Katrina Kaif still tries to act despite looking so good and did I say that Ranbir Kapoor is very cute? However, some of the supporting cast including Darshan Zariwala as RK's father acted as glue to keep the crap together.

Overall, I would say if you're in a theater filled with people who laugh at nonsenical jokes, have the permission or gumption to carry alcohol to the movie, or have just had a generally bad day, this might be a way of killing of some valuable time. For what it's worth, I would like my 3 hours back.